Below is another editorial report. I believe that the changes I have made have greatly improved the video essay which I feel make my project better overall.
Selection from rough cut:
1:18-2:32
Link
Re-Edited Selection:
2:02-3:11
Link
1. The content did not change too much. Instead of holding the focus only on the photos, I occasionally had the camera focus back to me and then to the photos. This was more effective as it reminded authors about who was talking and helped improve the transitions of my video essay.
2. The form changed as I made the photos last longer in the newer version of the video essay. This was to emphasis how poorly the workers were treated with the inhumane living standards the migrants in Qatar had to face.
Sunday, April 24, 2016
Editorial Report 13a
Below are the attached link of the rough cut and fine cut. I did a little bit of editing which overall improved the form and content of my video essay.
Selection from Rough-cut:
0:37-1:13
Link
Re-Edited Selection:
1:06-1:23
Link
1. Honestly, the content hardly changed. Apart from pronunciation, tone and a few changes in word choice, nothing changed. The content is being communicated more effectively in the newer version as the camera can record me more clearer with better lighting.
2. The form changed slightly. I changed how the photos were placed in the video as well as when they enter in the video. I feel as though I spoke more clearly with the re-edited version.
Selection from Rough-cut:
0:37-1:13
Link
Re-Edited Selection:
1:06-1:23
Link
1. Honestly, the content hardly changed. Apart from pronunciation, tone and a few changes in word choice, nothing changed. The content is being communicated more effectively in the newer version as the camera can record me more clearer with better lighting.
2. The form changed slightly. I changed how the photos were placed in the video as well as when they enter in the video. I feel as though I spoke more clearly with the re-edited version.
Revised Post to Peer Reviewers
The project has officially ended. I did my best to improve my video essay and I am overall very proud of what I have created. I would appreciate it if anyone leaves a comment about what they thought of the video.
Audience question: I anticipate the post-production process to be easy. I have a lot of experience now completing three projects now. I learnt from my mistakes and have improved tremendously as a writer I believe.
Author Response:
Key information: FIFA is the soccer organization which governs all leagues and tournaments related to soccer in all countries around the world. Sep Blatter was the FIFA President at the time of the 2022 World Cup voting election. Qatar is a small but very rich oil nation in the middle east.
Major issues or weaknesses: I feel as though I could have add more as I feel something is missing. As to what it is I do not know. Additionally, the reasons I included are only the main issues about the Qatar World Cup, as there are also many other relevant and important problems about Qatar hosting the world cup which I did not have time to include.
Strengths of the fine cut: I feel as though I gave enough content and my own personal opinion in the video essay. I worked hard on making sure I met the conventions of my genre. It took a while to organize everything but I feel as though it was worth it in the end.
Fine Cut Link: Here
Audience question: I anticipate the post-production process to be easy. I have a lot of experience now completing three projects now. I learnt from my mistakes and have improved tremendously as a writer I believe.
Author Response:
Key information: FIFA is the soccer organization which governs all leagues and tournaments related to soccer in all countries around the world. Sep Blatter was the FIFA President at the time of the 2022 World Cup voting election. Qatar is a small but very rich oil nation in the middle east.
Major issues or weaknesses: I feel as though I could have add more as I feel something is missing. As to what it is I do not know. Additionally, the reasons I included are only the main issues about the Qatar World Cup, as there are also many other relevant and important problems about Qatar hosting the world cup which I did not have time to include.
Strengths of the fine cut: I feel as though I gave enough content and my own personal opinion in the video essay. I worked hard on making sure I met the conventions of my genre. It took a while to organize everything but I feel as though it was worth it in the end.
Fine Cut Link: Here
Reflection on Post Production Phase II
My freshman year is coming to an end along with the final stage of project 3. This was the most enjoyable project I completed in this class so far. Overall, project 3 went very well. Below is my reflection of the Post Production Phase II.
1. Success this week was adding more content to my video essay. In addition, I improved the form of the video essay as it is more structured. There is now a better flow in the video with transitions added to make the video look more professional.
2. Challenges were finding the time to do the video essay and improve on it. As the rough cut was done, I lost ideas on what to develop on or what I could add. I feel as though my video essay is missing something but I am not sure what is it exactly.
3. Next week will go well I think. Although I have two exams this coming week, I believe that I will be able to manage my time wisely as I will work on starting the next assignment.
4. I am feeling very relieved at this point. The project is almost over and I am very close to submitting the final copy. I did enjoy doing this project as it was fun to make a video essay, I was very passionate about the subject I chose as I have a great interest in this scandal and hold a strong opinion in this issue.
1. Success this week was adding more content to my video essay. In addition, I improved the form of the video essay as it is more structured. There is now a better flow in the video with transitions added to make the video look more professional.
2. Challenges were finding the time to do the video essay and improve on it. As the rough cut was done, I lost ideas on what to develop on or what I could add. I feel as though my video essay is missing something but I am not sure what is it exactly.
3. Next week will go well I think. Although I have two exams this coming week, I believe that I will be able to manage my time wisely as I will work on starting the next assignment.
4. I am feeling very relieved at this point. The project is almost over and I am very close to submitting the final copy. I did enjoy doing this project as it was fun to make a video essay, I was very passionate about the subject I chose as I have a great interest in this scandal and hold a strong opinion in this issue.
Peer review for Veronica
Veronica made a standard college essay. I enjoyed reading it and recommend fellow classmates to read. Below is my peer review for Veronica along with the attached link of her project.
Audience question: I practised my editorial skills this week in peer review activities and also by reviewing my own script for my video essay. My editorial skills have definitely improved by reading and assessing my classmates' works and giving advice on what to develop on.
Name: Veronica
Title: English Project 3: When I was Little
Hyperlink: Here
Explanation of the peer review activity selected: I chose this person's work as the topic looked interesting and I believe I could give valuable feedback. In addition this person is from a different section and I have never reviewed her work before.
Explanation of how I think my feedback helped the author: I think my feedback helped the author as I clearly gave doable and valuable feedback which the author will benefit from. I believe that if she follows my advice the paper will be more successful and improve the paper's quality overall. In addition, I did a standard college essay before as my genre for project 2. Thus, with my own experience I can help give her tips on what I did.
Explanation of how I incorporated course material into my feedback: By looking through the rubric of project 3 I used course material in my feedback. Additionally, as I have previous knowledge from giving past peer review feedbacks and having personally completed a standard college essay as my genre for project 2, I used course material into my feedback.
One thing I admired from their work or learnt from: I really enjoyed reading this essay through it's tone. The tone was very personal and story like which I admired. In addition the content given was very descriptive and easy to understand.
Audience question: I practised my editorial skills this week in peer review activities and also by reviewing my own script for my video essay. My editorial skills have definitely improved by reading and assessing my classmates' works and giving advice on what to develop on.
Name: Veronica
Title: English Project 3: When I was Little
Hyperlink: Here
Explanation of the peer review activity selected: I chose this person's work as the topic looked interesting and I believe I could give valuable feedback. In addition this person is from a different section and I have never reviewed her work before.
Explanation of how I think my feedback helped the author: I think my feedback helped the author as I clearly gave doable and valuable feedback which the author will benefit from. I believe that if she follows my advice the paper will be more successful and improve the paper's quality overall. In addition, I did a standard college essay before as my genre for project 2. Thus, with my own experience I can help give her tips on what I did.
Explanation of how I incorporated course material into my feedback: By looking through the rubric of project 3 I used course material in my feedback. Additionally, as I have previous knowledge from giving past peer review feedbacks and having personally completed a standard college essay as my genre for project 2, I used course material into my feedback.
One thing I admired from their work or learnt from: I really enjoyed reading this essay through it's tone. The tone was very personal and story like which I admired. In addition the content given was very descriptive and easy to understand.
Peer review for Jake
Below is my peer review for Jake. Jake's topic was about school lunches which was an interesting essay. I recommend anyone to take a look at it.
Audience question: I practised my editorial skills this week in peer review activities and also by reviewing my own script for my video essay. My editorial skills have definitely improved by reading and assessing my classmates' works and giving advice on what to develop on.
Author: Jake Gyles
Hyperlink: Here
Explanation of peer activity chosen: I chose this draft as I do not believe I have looked at this student's work before. In addition, this student's work looked interested to give feedback on. In addition he is in my section making it suitable for me to choose this for peer review 13a.
Explanation of how I believe my feedback has helped the author in some way: I believe my feedback will help the author improve the overall form of his essay. As I did a standard college essay for my genre in the last project, my experience has allowed me to explain what things the author of a standard college essay should aim for and what to avoid doing.
Explanation of how I used course material in my feedback: By using previous knowledge I already had from giving peer reviews, I incorporated this previous knowledge in my work. Furthermore I used the rubric to refer from in my feedback.
Audience question: I practised my editorial skills this week in peer review activities and also by reviewing my own script for my video essay. My editorial skills have definitely improved by reading and assessing my classmates' works and giving advice on what to develop on.
Title:Packed vs. School Made Lunches: Which is the Better Option for your Child?
Author: Jake Gyles
Hyperlink: Here
Explanation of peer activity chosen: I chose this draft as I do not believe I have looked at this student's work before. In addition, this student's work looked interested to give feedback on. In addition he is in my section making it suitable for me to choose this for peer review 13a.
Explanation of how I believe my feedback has helped the author in some way: I believe my feedback will help the author improve the overall form of his essay. As I did a standard college essay for my genre in the last project, my experience has allowed me to explain what things the author of a standard college essay should aim for and what to avoid doing.
Explanation of how I used course material in my feedback: By using previous knowledge I already had from giving peer reviews, I incorporated this previous knowledge in my work. Furthermore I used the rubric to refer from in my feedback.
One thing I learnt or admired from their work: What I admired from their work is how personal and story like it can be. This can be seen in the intro as Jake gives a very detailed essay which helps readers understand what is being described easily. In addition the subject to argue about is an interesting subject and it was interesting to hear what Jake's opinion was on this issue.
Sunday, April 17, 2016
Open Post to Peer Reviewers
Finally! My rough cut is finished and open for classmates to view. I feel as though there is still more work I could do to improve the video essay. I have yet to add some more video clips, photos and other graphics. None the less, I am pleased with my rough cut and feel comfortable finishing the rough cut in time. This is because I have managed my time well and have worked pretty well in advance.
Audience question:
Based off of what I have accomplished during the production phase, I anticipate the post-production phase to be smoother than this week. I have completed my rough draft and now have a foundation I can develop on. There are still some more things I could add and edit but I believe this will not take too long and will not be too much of a challenge hopefully.
Author response:
The topic for my project is about how I feel FIFA is doing a wrong decision in letting Qatar host the Fifa World Cup in 2022. Qatar has used bribery to win the bid, treated migrant workers unfairly, and do not permit homosexuality. These are only some the few reasons which I believe justify that Qatar should not host the World Cup.
The weaknesses in the rough cut is that there will be a few moments where pronounce things wrong. Another thing to note is that there will be a few awkward silent pauses in the video during transitions which is an issue I need to fix.
Strengths are that I managed to include all my ideas well. I used some of the conventions and presented a somewhat news report style video which I believe makes the video look credible and somewhat professional to an extent.
Rough Cut Here
Audience question:
Based off of what I have accomplished during the production phase, I anticipate the post-production phase to be smoother than this week. I have completed my rough draft and now have a foundation I can develop on. There are still some more things I could add and edit but I believe this will not take too long and will not be too much of a challenge hopefully.
Author response:
The topic for my project is about how I feel FIFA is doing a wrong decision in letting Qatar host the Fifa World Cup in 2022. Qatar has used bribery to win the bid, treated migrant workers unfairly, and do not permit homosexuality. These are only some the few reasons which I believe justify that Qatar should not host the World Cup.
The weaknesses in the rough cut is that there will be a few moments where pronounce things wrong. Another thing to note is that there will be a few awkward silent pauses in the video during transitions which is an issue I need to fix.
Strengths are that I managed to include all my ideas well. I used some of the conventions and presented a somewhat news report style video which I believe makes the video look credible and somewhat professional to an extent.
Rough Cut Here
Editorial Report 12b
This another selection from the rough cut which I have re-edited. I believe that the changes I have made will greatly improve my project's content.
Selection from 'Rough Cut':
The workers building stadiums for the World Cup is just another problem, which indicates that Qatar hosting the World Cup is not a good idea. Almost all of the workers that are constructing the stadiums for the World Cup are migrants from India, Pakistan, Nepal and other underdeveloped nations. They are working inhumane conditions with poor living standards. Firstly, there is evidence that proves that the migrant workers are forced to stay and work in Qatar. Qatari companies have taken away the passports of migrant workers and are thus not permitted to leave. Furthermore, the workers are paid close to nothing considering the amount of work they contribute. The living standards are also poor with most living in slums. This violation of basic human rights is just one of the many factors which prove that Qatar should not be allowed to host the world cup. These acts in many cases show how similar workers are to slaves.
Re-edited Selection:
Selection from 'Rough Cut':
The workers building stadiums for the World Cup is just another problem, which indicates that Qatar hosting the World Cup is not a good idea. Almost all of the workers that are constructing the stadiums for the World Cup are migrants from India, Pakistan, Nepal and other underdeveloped nations. They are working inhumane conditions with poor living standards. Firstly, there is evidence that proves that the migrant workers are forced to stay and work in Qatar. Qatari companies have taken away the passports of migrant workers and are thus not permitted to leave. Furthermore, the workers are paid close to nothing considering the amount of work they contribute. The living standards are also poor with most living in slums. This violation of basic human rights is just one of the many factors which prove that Qatar should not be allowed to host the world cup. These acts in many cases show how similar workers are to slaves.
Re-edited Selection:
Another issue behind hosting the World Cup in Qatar is the
treatment of workers involved in the construction projects for the World Cup. Almost
all of the workers that are constructing the stadiums for the World Cup are
migrants from India, Pakistan, Nepal and other underdeveloped nations. The
migrant workers have been found working in inhumane conditions with poor living
standards. Firstly, there is evidence that proves that the migrant workers are
forced to stay and work in Qatar. Qatari companies have taken away the
passports of migrant workers and are thus not permitted to leave. Furthermore,
the workers are paid close to nothing. This is unfair considering the amount of
work they contribute. The living standards are also poor with most living in
slums. This violation of basic human rights is just one of the many factors
which prove that Qatar should not be allowed to host the world cup. These acts
in many cases show how similar workers are to slaves.
1. The content changed as I elaborated more on certain points in the selected section of my project. In addition I corrected some grammatical and spelling errors. I did change some words to more vocab words which makes my project sound more credible.
2. The form of this section did not change to much. I mostly changed the length of certain sentences. In addition I made the introductory or topic sentence more concise and shorter. These changes I feel will help present the content more effectively.
1. The content changed as I elaborated more on certain points in the selected section of my project. In addition I corrected some grammatical and spelling errors. I did change some words to more vocab words which makes my project sound more credible.
2. The form of this section did not change to much. I mostly changed the length of certain sentences. In addition I made the introductory or topic sentence more concise and shorter. These changes I feel will help present the content more effectively.
Editorial Report 12a
Below is my editorial report. I believe that this activity helped improve the quality of my script which will be beneficial for my video essay.
Selection from 'Rough Cut': The FBI and other investigators believe that bribery took place in the 2022 World Cup campaign and led to Qatar winning the bid believe it. It is possible that this improper act was done for Qatar’s economic gain. In relation, the F.B.I. has discovered that a Qatari firm paid FIFA vice president Jack Warner around $2 million for supporting the Qatari campaign’s bid. This shows that the Qatar World Cup bid should be revoked from this injustice.
Selection from 'Rough Cut': The FBI and other investigators believe that bribery took place in the 2022 World Cup campaign and led to Qatar winning the bid believe it. It is possible that this improper act was done for Qatar’s economic gain. In relation, the F.B.I. has discovered that a Qatari firm paid FIFA vice president Jack Warner around $2 million for supporting the Qatari campaign’s bid. This shows that the Qatar World Cup bid should be revoked from this injustice.
Re-edited Selection:
The FBI and other investigators believe that bribery took
place in the 2022 World Cup campaign. They also suspect that this is the
primary reason that led to Qatar winning the bid to host the World Cup.
Additionally it is possible that this improper act was done for Qatar’s
economic gain. In relation, the F.B.I. has discovered that a Qatari firm paid
FIFA vice president Jack Warner around $2 million for supporting the Qatari
campaign’s bid. This shows that the Qatar World Cup bid should be revoked from these
unlawful acts.
1. The content changed slight as I changed certain words. I also made some sentences shorter and less wordy. In addition I made more sentences as many of my sentences from the rough cut were too complex and long.
2. The form did not change too much to be honest. The sentences lengths changed as I made many of the sentences more simple and less wordy.
1. The content changed slight as I changed certain words. I also made some sentences shorter and less wordy. In addition I made more sentences as many of my sentences from the rough cut were too complex and long.
2. The form did not change too much to be honest. The sentences lengths changed as I made many of the sentences more simple and less wordy.
Saturday, April 16, 2016
Reflection on Post-Production Phase I
This week is coming to an end as I finish the rough cut. Overall this week has not been too stressful as I have had a lot of time to work on my project and blog posts with ease.
1. Success during this week's process was that I am just about finished with the rough cut. There is only a little bit more to add until it is finally complete to share with the rest of the class. I also managed to get through most of the blog posts easily this week without rushing. I only have one or two more blog posts left to complete so this week overall went splendid.
2. Challenges I faced was that I couldn't finish all this work earlier in the week. I managed to complete all my work towards the end of the week which was something I would not have hoped for.
3. Next week I think will go well since I finally will have put out my rough draft. All that is left to do is a few blog posts, revising and editing.
4. Overall I am feeling content with the project at this point. I haven't been struggling too much with this project and seem to be on the right track. Thus, I believe with minimal challenges, I will create a successful project
1. Success during this week's process was that I am just about finished with the rough cut. There is only a little bit more to add until it is finally complete to share with the rest of the class. I also managed to get through most of the blog posts easily this week without rushing. I only have one or two more blog posts left to complete so this week overall went splendid.
2. Challenges I faced was that I couldn't finish all this work earlier in the week. I managed to complete all my work towards the end of the week which was something I would not have hoped for.
3. Next week I think will go well since I finally will have put out my rough draft. All that is left to do is a few blog posts, revising and editing.
4. Overall I am feeling content with the project at this point. I haven't been struggling too much with this project and seem to be on the right track. Thus, I believe with minimal challenges, I will create a successful project
Peer Review for Ben Barnett
Below is my second peer review for this week. Ben was from a different class section and I really admired his work. In addition his topic seemed very interesting to read. I hope that my feedback will be useful for Ben.
Audience question: Not only did I practise my editorial skills this week in peer review, I improved as an editor from my production reports. By looking more at other peoples works I learn more about what I could do as a writer and certain elements I am missing in my project. This consequently has improved me as a writer.
Audience question: Not only did I practise my editorial skills this week in peer review, I improved as an editor from my production reports. By looking more at other peoples works I learn more about what I could do as a writer and certain elements I am missing in my project. This consequently has improved me as a writer.
Name: Ben
Link: Here
Explanation of the peer review activity you selected: I chose this post as I thought it looked interesting. In addition I am supposed to give useful feedback to help improve my fellow peer's project.
Explanation of how I helped: I believe that I helped my peer with their project as my feedback will be able to help improve the overall quality of Ben's project. Additionally my feedback is clear and useful making it very easy for Ben to follow my advice.
Explanation of how I incorporated something from course material in my feedback: Apart from what I learnt from in class and previous experience I had from peer reviewing other students' work, I used the project 3 rubric to make sure everything was met from the work to the criteria.
One thing in their work I admired of learnt from: I liked the subject they discussed about Uranium production. This is a subject I have little knowledge in so it was interesting learning about this issue.
Peer Review for Sienna
Below is my peer review for Sienna. I believe that I have improved the quality of my peer reviews over time as I have done many reviews in the past and have good experience from this. I hope that my feedback is effective and will help Sienna's project.
Audience question: Not only did I practise my editorial skills this week in peer review, I improved as an editor from my production reports. By looking more at other peoples works I learn more about what I could do as a writer and certain elements I am missing in my project. This consequently has improved me as a writer.
Name: Sienna
Title: Production Report 11a
Link: Here
Explanation of peer activity: This activity is to allow students to help their classmates work by giving suggestions on how they can improve their work. As this is a student in my class, it is my role to help give useful and constructive feedback.
Explanation of how I helped the author with my feedback: I believe that I helped the author with feedback as I gave useful and doable suggestions that she can benefit from. This will hopefully improve the overall form and quality of the essay.
Explanation of how I incorporated course material: Although I have become more experienced in giving feedback, I refer to the genre examples and project 3's rubric to assess Sienna's work.
One thing about their work I admired or learnt from: I admired how she managed to connect all different ideas well in a organized manner that did not confuse me while reading. Additionally the personal approach of the essay is something I need to consider using more when creating my own project.
Audience question: Not only did I practise my editorial skills this week in peer review, I improved as an editor from my production reports. By looking more at other peoples works I learn more about what I could do as a writer and certain elements I am missing in my project. This consequently has improved me as a writer.
Name: Sienna
Title: Production Report 11a
Link: Here
Explanation of peer activity: This activity is to allow students to help their classmates work by giving suggestions on how they can improve their work. As this is a student in my class, it is my role to help give useful and constructive feedback.
Explanation of how I helped the author with my feedback: I believe that I helped the author with feedback as I gave useful and doable suggestions that she can benefit from. This will hopefully improve the overall form and quality of the essay.
Explanation of how I incorporated course material: Although I have become more experienced in giving feedback, I refer to the genre examples and project 3's rubric to assess Sienna's work.
One thing about their work I admired or learnt from: I admired how she managed to connect all different ideas well in a organized manner that did not confuse me while reading. Additionally the personal approach of the essay is something I need to consider using more when creating my own project.
Sunday, April 10, 2016
Peer Review for David
Name: David
Title: Content Outline
Link: Here
Explanation of the peer review activity you selected for the project you reviewed: David's content outline looked interesting thus I decided to give my input.
Explanation of how I incorporated something from the suggests Student's guide readings or other course material: I will be using the rubric of project 3 to make sure there are no items missing as well as the content outline assignment page.
One thing I admired or learnt from in their work: The outline was set up well with a good and clear structure
Title: Content Outline
Link: Here
Explanation of the peer review activity you selected for the project you reviewed: David's content outline looked interesting thus I decided to give my input.
Explanation of how I incorporated something from the suggests Student's guide readings or other course material: I will be using the rubric of project 3 to make sure there are no items missing as well as the content outline assignment page.
One thing I admired or learnt from in their work: The outline was set up well with a good and clear structure
Peer Review for Gaby
Name: Gaby Marty
Title: Production Report
Link: Here
Explanation of the peer review activity you selected for the project you reviewed: I chose this person's production report as it was one of many which looked interesting to examine and give advice on how to improve this part of their essay.
Explanation of how I incorporated something from the suggests Student's guide readings or other course material: I will of course be using the project 3 criteria in order to make sure all specifications are met.
One thing I admired or learnt from in their work: I liked their writing style and word choice as it showed credibility and was enjoyable to read from.
Title: Production Report
Link: Here
Explanation of the peer review activity you selected for the project you reviewed: I chose this person's production report as it was one of many which looked interesting to examine and give advice on how to improve this part of their essay.
Explanation of how I incorporated something from the suggests Student's guide readings or other course material: I will of course be using the project 3 criteria in order to make sure all specifications are met.
One thing I admired or learnt from in their work: I liked their writing style and word choice as it showed credibility and was enjoyable to read from.
Report 11b
Below is my first production report to project 3. There is still much to do but any suggestions would help.
Audience question: I used form to present my content to make sure that my project is well organized. I avoided showing bias as much as I could.
Outline Item:
Adaption of Outline Item:
Audience question: I used form to present my content to make sure that my project is well organized. I avoided showing bias as much as I could.
Outline Item:
Main body section 2:
-Main idea: How workers in Qatar building are working in inhumane
conditions and unethical circumstances
-Evidence: There is evidence showing that workers from India,
Pakistan, Nepal and other nations are forced to stay and work in Qatar. By
Qatari companies taking away the passports of migrant workers, they are not
allowed to leave. In addition, they are paid close to nothing considering the
amount of work they do. Furthermore, the living standards are poor for these
workers with most living in slums.
-What the evidence proves: Workers are living in poor conditions,
are trapped in Qatar and cannot leave, and are not getting paid enough for the
amount of work they do
-Importance of evidence: The evidence proves that workers are
similar to slaves
Adaption of Outline Item:
The workers building stadiums for the World Cup is just
another problem, which indicates that Qatar hosting the World Cup is not a good
idea. Almost all of the workers that are constructing the stadiums for the
World Cup are migrants from India, Pakistan, Nepal and other underdeveloped
nations. They are working inhumane conditions with poor living standards.
Firstly, there is evidence that proves that the migrant workers are forced to
stay and work in Qatar. Qatari companies have taken away the passports of
migrant workers and are thus not permitted to leave. Furthermore, the workers
are paid close to nothing considering the amount of work they contribute. The
living standards are also poor with most living in slums. This violation of
basic human rights is just one of the many factors which prove that Qatar
should not be allowed to host the world cup. These acts in many cases show how similar
workers are to slaves.
Production Report 11a
Below is my first production report to project 3. There is still much to do but any suggestions would help.
Audience question: I used form to present my content to make sure that my project is well organized. I avoided showing bias as much as I could.
Outline Item:
Audience question: I used form to present my content to make sure that my project is well organized. I avoided showing bias as much as I could.
Outline Item:
Main body section 1:
-Main idea: How bribery led to Qatar's bid win is clearly
improper and used for economical gain
-Evidence: An F.B.I investigation found that a Qatari firm paid
Jack Warner (FIFA vice president) around $2 million.
Adaption of Outline Item
The FBI and other investigators believe that bribery took
place in the 2022 World Cup campaign and led to Qatar winning the bid believe
it. It is possible that this improper act was done for Qatar’s economic gain.
In relation, the F.B.I. has discovered that a Qatari firm paid FIFA vice
president Jack Warner around $2 million for supporting the Qatari campaign’s
bid. This shows that the Qatar World Cup bid should be revoked from this
injustice.